Sorry for the very long hiatus. Quickly, what happened was I went to work on an election campaign for a week and a half. I spent roughly 16 hours a day working to get someone elected, not including the 44 straight hours I was up from Election Night Eve through Election Day. My guy won, so it was exhilarating, but I was just spent by the end of it. It took me a while to get back into the swing of things at work, and I finally got caught up on everything last week.
So here we are once again, and I didn't know what to write about. Sometimes, when you haven't delved into a topic that you are so used to delving into, it creates a blockage in your brain. I simply had no good ideas for a column, no sound angles to impart some great insight. But it has just been way too long without a post, and I finally feel like I have at least some good points to make. I hope you all agree.
It's been two episodes since I last posted and I can't say a lot has happened on Cutthroat. The teams have evened themselves out again, a lot of dead weight is gone, and we aren't quite to C.T.'s big arrival yet. Also, I have a bad tooth ache. But there are a couple of cast members that must be discussed.
First up, Brandon. I'm discussing him only to illustrate a point about the show that I'm not sold on. Brandon is a normal guy. This point cannot be emphasized enough. He is a good dude who plays the game straight and keeps quiet about it. He isn't a douchebag (I know, how can he not be a douchebag when he is on this show?) or a sinister plotter. But he's also not a holier-than-though guy who rails against everyone who plays the game shadily. I do not care for those people either because they tend to be more than willing to abandon those convictions when an opportunity presents itself. Looking at you Evelyn and Coral. Essentially, Brandon is someone who should do well in these challenges if life was fair. But of course, the show wouldn't be good if that was true. Brandon got sent into the Gulag yet again, to the clear dismay of TJ. TJ was absolutely correct in his disgust. Brandon proved himself again and again and was a solid competitor. But he got intentionally screwed by his team when they told him to be the anchor on a challenge and set him up to take the blame when they failed. The part that frustrated me was Brandon knew what his team was doing while it was happening. Then during deliberation, Brad mentioned that it was Brandon's fault for the loss because of he stepped up to lead and failed. Brandon and Brad both knew that wasn't the case, yet for some inexplicable reason, Brandon didn't fight back. He seemed resigned to his fate of constantly going into the Gulag every time. The bottom line is Brandon doesn't have it in him to be an asshole back to everyone else, and it screwed him in the end.
But Brandon's situation illustrated a fact about the shows I do not like. If you are a rookie, you are going home early. There is no thrill to the game in that respect. I'll look at a team before the season starts, and I can pretty accurately determine who will be left in the end. That's not a good thing. There needs to be rule changes that make it so the same person can't keep going into the elimination challenge. Man, this really grinds my gears! I mean, everyone who has done a few challenges are best friends, apparently. They couldn't possibly vote against each other, right!! When thousands of dollars are on the line, the best way to ensure you are going to win is to have your friends with you in the end, the same friends who are now in their thirties still binge drinking and chain smoking. You need to get rid of the strong rookie who is ten years younger and has more stamina because, you know, he has to prove himself by being sent home too early.
I guess I'm asking too much for these competitors to think logically here.
The big story of the hiatus has to be Ty's freak out. Be honest, was anyone really surprised by this? The guy may have actually hit a female on Real World DC. I'm still shocked a bigger deal wasn't made out of that and that the producers invited him on the Challenge. Well, sure enough, Ty's psychotic side ( at this point, I think we should just say Ty and leave out "psychotic side" since that's his only side) emerges and he gets into near-fights with almost everyone, including Brandon, Johnny "Domestic Violence" and even Emily. The funny thing is no one seems to care that he almost hits Emily yet again. (Cue me shaking my head)
If you think the crazy ends there, boy are you mistaken! At the elimination challenge, it's Brandon vs. Ty and Ty is TJ Lavining it. Seriously, Brandon doesn't stand a chance. Or so we think. Because we failed to account for Ty's craziness. After Brandon manages to push Ty out of bounds, Ty amazingly quits. I wish I could explain why he chose to not get back in bounds and continue but I can't. He was bigger and stronger than Brandon in every way so if he was tired, you know Brandon was exhausted. Everyone is yelling for Ty to get up, eqaully dumbfounded as me why he simply won't. After TJ counts him out (because apparently this is pro wrestling) the medics have to come over and re-orient a confused Ty. Now, seeing this, one would think Ty suffered a serious concussion. Except all that happened was he gradually fell over a chain while attached to a harness contraption. He literally fell as slow as anyone could possibly fall. He gently laid his back down onto the ground. His head never even hit the ground until he placed it down like one does on a pillow.
Folks, there is no rational explanation except to say that Ty is certifiably insane. How we was allowed on the Real World to begin with is nothing short of miraculous. We will no doubt read MTV.com two years from now and discover that Ty murdered his family. It's sad, but true. It made me think; if there was a new season of Real World but instead of strangers it was the weirdest former cast members, who would go in the house. Now I'm not talking about crazy cast members who get into Jersey-shore like fights or agree to eat a bug. I'm talking really weird people who have serious social disorders. So far here is my list:
Ty (RW DC)
Ryan (RW New Orleans)
Brooke (RW Denver)
Karamo (RW Philadelphia)
Tonya (RW Chicago)
Stephen (RW Seattle)
If anyone has any other nominees, let me know. Technically we still need one more.
I hope everyone enjoyed my first column back and thanks to those who kept checking the site during my hiatus. I was seriously contemplating shutting it down if I saw there was no traffic at all during the hiatus. I felt like I shot myself in the foot but my fears were unnecessary. I'll do my best to reward you all for your loyalty.
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