Real World Female Character Analysis (the notable ones)

Two guys are sitting at a bar enjoying a few beers. They’re mid twenties, both in relationships, both with prestigious jobs. The two guys start arguing with each other in a jovial manner, and we see they have a slew of papers in front of them. The bartender is giving them odd looks.

Now, would it be sad if they were arguing about work? No? What if it was about fantasy baseball? Maybe a little pathetic, but it is a very common thing for twenty year old guys to be involved in. Well, what if they were arguing about the greatest female characters in Real World history and had printed out spreadsheets and charts?

Welcome to my life.

A couple of weeks ago, this is exactly what was transpiring in a midtown bar in Manhattan around 7:00 PM on a Friday. My buddy Josh, another long time fan, and I were meticulously perusing our depth charts of female cast members, trying to decipher what exactly makes a great female cast member and who was the best of all time. This get together was a long time coming. We had always talked about the females on the Real World in a different way than the males. To be blunt, we talked about how hot they were. Especially in college. A lot of times, these females were actually boring characters. But we always seemed to overlook that fact when discussing if we liked the season or not. But inevitably, the discussion began to turn to more of a personality-based opinion. And, of course, if they were hot, all the better. When Real World: Brooklyn debuted, Josh and I were taken aback by the relative unattractiveness of the female. By the midway point of the season, we were completely focused on how boring they were and how much we’d hate living with them. Then came Real World: Cancun. Objectively, the girls on the show were quite attractive. But whereas in college, we would have said the season was fantastic, now the season was mediocre. As we’ve grown wiser and entered into mature relationships, we have altered our perception of what makes a great female cast member. This is especially ironic because we are attempting to maturely discuss a show geared towards teenagers.

Which brings us back to my friend Josh and I sitting at the bar, progressively getting drunker and louder. While we admit we are very sad individuals (and confirmed by the bartender), our work is important work. Only two devoted fans and self-described experts could put the effort and thought into such an endeavor. So you’re welcome, world. We debase ourselves for your benefit.

As to the actual results of our study (you all will like this)

From years of watching the show, we have concluded that a female cast member must score highly in 3 categories to be considered amongst the greatest Real Worlders of all time. Those categories are: Hotness, Personality, and Entertainment. We strongly considered weighting the categories differently, but we aren’t great at math, especially when drunk. Quite simply, we averaged the three scores to arrive at our results.

The scores came with much debate. Obviously these categories are subjective, but both of us made our cases regarding each female. Ultimately, we believe these results are about as accurate as could be expected. It must be mentioned that this list is based solely on the females’ Real World season. Challenges do not count. Also of note is that we did not include many characters. I’d like to tell you there was a reason for excluding certain people, but the truth is we forgot them in the first go around and were too lazy to include them later on. Besides, no one we omitted would have ranked either that high or that low.

So here is the rankings of the top Female Real World Cast Members (click on picture for better view):

As you can see, there aren’t many conclusions we can draw aside from who is ranked hottest, most entertaining, etc. I had hoped the rankings would show that MTV has been using lesser attractive females who have bitchy personalities and are horrible to live with, which has brought down the quality of the show (We both feel the quality of the show has gone down significantly in the last 4 seasons and thought this may have been the reason). But the results don’t necessarily reflect that. While the females have been more vocal in the houses, this has begat both interesting and annoying cast members. Additionally, the level of attractiveness now is not so different than in the mid to late 1990’s, considered by many to be the best stretch of the show.

San Diego was clearly one the best seasons, in my opinion, and the ranking reflect that. Also, in general, a cast composed of attractive to very attractive females will be a good season. In looking at the top 10, there weren’t too many surprises. Cameron was number one, spurred on by her beauty mostly. But you know what? She was a fun girl who had an interesting plotline that season. She was easy going and seemed to be fun to live with. There were some pleasant surprises too. Jenn from RW: Denver came in second. Now, before we started, I wouldn’t have thought that could happen. But look at the facts. She is very attractive. She caused a bunch of drama in the house, but in a fun way. And she seemed to be cool to live with.

Likewise, this list is not without controversy. Some of you may be wondering how Corel, Ruthie, or Tonya didn’t crack the top 10. I wondered that too. But then I remembered two important facts. First, this is solely based on their Real World season. So even though Tonya became “Must See TV” on the challenges, on her season, she was very annoying and the things that made her entertaining in the beginning got old very quick. Secondly, this rating system takes into account looks and personality. Some people do not think about how they would get along with a cast member when determining their greatness. We did, and we included looks. Ruthie was awesome as a character, but she wasn’t as attractive as others. We’re looking for the whole package here.

So there you have it. We are completely open to others opinions on this. If anyone wants to do a similar list for guys, I welcome that. I’m considering doing one but with a whole different rating structure. In addition, I might subsequently do a rating that includes the Challenges. I mean, how can we not include Kenny, Casey, Evan, and Evelyn? And congratulations Cameron for being the best Real World female cast member. I’m sure you are honored and humbled by this award and want to brag to all your friends. And to you, Irene McGee, seriously, what the hell?