In case you missed it, my idol Bill Simmons and the czar of reality television, Dave Jacoby, had on their podcast the incomparable T.J. Lavin to dish on the Challenge. I can’t tell you how excited I was when I saw that posted on Simmons’ twitter. Imagine a 10 year old being informed they were going to Wrestlemania and then just getting more excited as it got closer to the event. Eventually, the kid gets so excited he tears up and maybe wets himself a little. That was me waiting for the podcast (and yes, I am joking. I only wet myself after bad dreams).
TJ seriously TJ Lavined it on the podcast. He was funny, engaging, dished on all the good dirt, and only went slightly overboard on the number of gnarlies he threw into the conversation. But most importantly, he answered quite a few nagging questions I’ve had since the show debuted. Below are some of the highlights:
-TJ proposed to the producers that if someone goads another into punching them, then the puncher should not get thrown off the show. He used the Darrell/Brad fight to illustrate this point. And he is absolutely correct. Everyone loves the Jersey Shore in part because of the fights. The roommates are allowed to brawl without fear of being sent home. The Challenge needs to incorporate more of this. Considering all the ego and steroids involved in a given season ( and craziness, can’t forget that. CT comes to mind, obviously), preventing these people from letting out their aggression on each other is downright criminal. Or maybe it actually saves lives. I can’t be sure.
-Along those same lines, TJ suggested they put a “rubber room” in the house so that if two people have serious issues and agree to fight, they can go in this room and brawl. Once they enter that rule, neither can get sent home for throwing a punch. I also like this idea, but think it’s a bit counterintuitive to how fights actually happen. Generally, there is a lot of talk and then suddenly someone overreacts. Then we have a good old tussle. When you stop the guys and ask them if they want to go into the room, it allows for rational thought to take over and calmer heads to prevail. It is no longer an impulse move. Besides, people fight differently. Some people prefer to get in the cheap shot as opposed to squaring up against someone else ala boxing. I think the idea of a room is smart and overall I support it.
-When TJ was talking about how he calls out competitors, he mentioned Evelyn and said she was an “alpha-male…I mean, alpha-female” and then proceeded to crack up. The great thing about TJ is he gets the stupidity of the show and the contestants. He could live in a bubble and treat the show very seriously, but he chooses to make fun of the players. Part of that can be explained by this next tidbit.
- TJ has no real interaction with the cast aside from the actual challenges. He does not know about any of the drama from the night before until the following morning when he receives updates from the producers. Simmons suggested they turn that into its own show, just have TJ reacting to the craziness. I’d watch. Hell, I’d Tivo also. TJ also does not keep in contact with anyone from the show aside from Kenny. First, of course he talks to Kenny. Kenny is just the only one cool enough and self aware enough to hang out with TJ. Second, I think this allows TJ to stay objective about the whole thing and even rip on the competitors. He isn’t beholden to anyone to keep certain things secret.
-TJ has never hooked up with any cast member, not that he didn’t want to at times.
- There has never been any documented drug use on the show, as far as TJ knows. Although everyone was highly suspicious of Luke on Fresh Meat 2.
-Kenny works on a dock when he isn’t filming the show or going to club promotions. Rachel runs a fitness-related business. Aside from that, the rest of the casts’ professions are a mystery to TJ. I’m a little disappointed that we couldn’t find out more about how these guys can do these challenges and still maintain regular employment. TJ suggested that they all do the club circuit. Really? People are paying $1,000 for Adam from RW:Paris?
-Simmons or Jacoby suggested they have the Challenge All-Stars go up against the Jersey Shore crew. Friggin’ AWESOME idea!!! It begs the extremely important question: Who do you put up there if you need to win a challenge. Let’s dissect this, shall we?
Jersey Shore crew:
The females do not seem to athletic, with the very notable exception of Sammi “Sweetheart.” JWoww smokes too much for any long distance competition, but can definitely “beat a bitch up.” Angelina arguably needs to lose a few pounds before she is in game shape. And Snooki, bless her pint-sized heart, doesn’t seem to be the most athletic and graceful person in the world. The guys, however, will be tough to beat. The Situation is a big dude in his own right, and even he isn’t as roided up as Ronnie. The big negative on Ronnie is he is only 3 feet 6. The weak link is Vinnie, but he probably could hold his own.
The Challenge crew:
Obviously, they hold a significant advantage in that they’ve all done these things a hundred times. Also, the top 4 girls are head and shoulders above the Jersey Shore girls. Something about being able to wake up before two pm, I think. Rachel is physically imposing. She would match up very well with JWoww. Evelyn is pretty much a man ( she has beaten guy competitors in elimination challenges, by the way). Laurel is the newcomer but just based on size alone, she is intimidating. Finally, I’m going with Ruthie. She won a challenge by herself and is sneaky strong.
The guys need to bring out the big guns to have a chance at matching up with The Sitch, Pauly D, and Ron Ron. You have to include C.T. He scares anyone, with our without the juice. I also have to include Evan. Physically, he can match up with the Situation. Kenny is a beast at these competitions and just a dynamic personality who can get under his opponents’ skin. Finally, and what may surprising to some but not loyal readers of this blog, I’m going with Frank from Vegas. He is physically there with the other guys, although a bit smaller. But he is relatively smart, and you know any challenge would include a spelling bee and Sudoku puzzles. You need a smart guy on the team.
Prediction: Real World Challenge All-Stars and it isn’t close.
Over all, the podcast exceeded my expectations and even furthered my excitement for the new season of the Challenge, Cutthroat. TJ said that CT does something so incredible that it is in his top 3 of all-time moments. If anyone wants to give a listen and learn some interesting things about the show, and have some laughs, here is the link.
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/simmons/
See you all after the premiere on Wednesday!
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